Not Enough Time...

I swear, I woke up this morning and had a revelation. It seemed as if just yesterday it was that groggy Monday morning, the first day back to work after a weekend of whatever, and I was depressed that there were still so many days left until I was able to enjoy yet another relaxing two days with nothing to do, no obligations – just time! But suddenly, as the coffee kicked in and I began to actually open my eyes, I came to and reality struck! It’s Thursday! Well, “This is great,” I thought to my self, “There’s only one more day until that weekend that I crave so much.” But then another harsh reality settled in; where the hell did the time go? What on Earth had I done between that lazy Monday back to work and this exhilarating Thursday as the week comes to a close once again? I’m thinking and thinking about my days, but I just can’t seem to put it all together. Strange. As I get older, time just doesn’t seem to stand still as much as it used to, it’s actually passing me by and I’m not really adapting to this well.
I feel almost as if I’m beginning to develop a slight case of Alzheimer’s disease. Seriously, I’m not joking and this is no laughing matter. I’m only 24 years old, yet I feel as if I’m operating on a scale comparable to that of an eighty-year-old. This is so not cool. I’ve been adjusting well to this whole grown-up thing. I’m living out my days in domestic bliss, getting up and going to work like an adult, coming home and spending time with my significant other, cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry, going on Saturday afternoon outings with my mother shopping for curtains - and I’m happy; these things, I like. But all of this other shit that comes along with it, I’m not really warming up to.
I don’t think that I actually have Alzheimer’s, but I do think that I know where the problem is coming from. I’m too damn busy – plain and simple. My days are so jam packed with things to do, places to go, dishes to wash, that life is just passing me on the right like a car speeding on an open highway. I don’t even have time to do the things that I love most, lately, like sit around on a rainy afternoon, or even a sunny one for that matter, and read a book, or go to the gym, which is killing me because I’m one of the biggest work-out-a-holics you’ll ever meet, or spend my weekends being lazy and not even leaving the house (or showering), I can’t find the time to just chat on the phone with my girlfriends about our love lives and school and work, I don’t even remember the last time I got my nails done. Is this what being an adult is like, because if so, I pass; skip me, on to the next one. I’m perfectly content staying young and vibrant and knowing what damn day it is!
I’m starting to wonder about so many things. There’s so much that I want to do in my lifetime; I want to travel to Europe and Alaska, I want to go skydiving, I want to live somewhere else for a while, I want to run my own business, I want to not do anything for a bit, I want to live! I feel like all this hustle and bustle of everyday life is taking away from the quality of the life I’m actually living. It’s entirely unhealthy, it’s certainly not ideal, and I think I want to make some changes to prevent this from continuing on. But what can I do, really? Quit my job? No, because number one, I can’t afford to and number two, I actually love what I do and wouldn’t want to give it up. So what else can I do? Move back home and return all these burdens unto my parents? I highly doubt that shit’s gonna fly. You know what would be great? If I could get a clone, if I just had one more of me to balance things out; she could stay home and maintain the apartment while I go off to work each day. She could make sure the dishes get done, the laundry is fresh, the toilet seat is put down (I hate that the most!), she could fill in for me with my business partner and clue me in when I get home from work, she could work the extra job on Friday nights for some pocket cash so that I wouldn’t have to quit because I’m just too tired. She could do it all (well, not everything, I’d still like to be the one who gets the good stuff, if you know what I mean); but she could keep me in shape at the gym every day, she could eat all the healthy food so I could enjoy the treats, she could go to those annoying annual doctor visits where you make an appointment for 10 a.m. but don’t actually get into the exam room until noon (and then wait another 20 minutes for the doctor to give a shit that you’re just sitting in there, snooping around), she could go to the Gyno, oh what a blessing that would be – basically, she could just do all of the mundane, day-to-day shit that I’d rather not be worried about so that I may enjoy a relaxed and fulfilling life. She could be the one to take on all the stress, all the heartache, all the worry and she wouldn’t feel bad about it either because that’s what she was created to do – she’d be like a robot (but not an actual one that could morph into some sub-human robotic species and take over the planet, oh no, she’d still have my morals and values and all that good stuff that keeps the peace, she’d just be immune to the common everyday annoyances of life).
Sounds good to me. I want to be able to wake up each day, breathe in and breathe out a sigh of relief; relief that I have an easy-going, stress-free day ahead of me, a day that I can do nothing else but enjoy, a day that I’m in control of and one where I am unhinged of countless obligations and “things I have to do.” Imagine the possibilities (but let’s not think about the possible pit falls of this wildly outrageous idea, that’s for her to do)! See? It’s already working…